Bullet Train & The Fall Guy
Every film reviewer has films that they’re extremely passionate about or are eager to discuss, whether to praise or highlight criticisms; good or bad; digging in deep to a film’s minute aspects because there is just so much to talk about. And other times, they’re just trying to hit a quota and churn out some thoughts on a movie they just don’t care about that much.
I was actually pretty excited to check out Bullet Train, since I misconstrued the general consensus of the film’s quality: I thought it was a lot more well-regarded than it is. People like it, of course, but skimming the Wikipedia page after the fact led me to discover a lot more mixed thoughts and 5-out-of-10s. With the clips and memes of it being shared and the low hum of light chatter online, I thought people liked Bullet Train more. But, since I haven’t seen the new Fantastic Four yet, and I’m planning to talk about both A Quiet Place and Sinners in the near future- whatever, let’s get this over with.
Bullet Train is a fairly loud and committee-assembled product that’s nonetheless stylish, unique and decently entertaining. Despite the absence of any powerhouse performances, it keeps things chugging along with its brutal and satisfying action, cutesy presentation and not insignificant amount of light chuckles.
Apparently, Bullet Train is based on a Japanese novel, which explains its setting and style, as well as a chunk of its mixed reception- there seems to have been a lot of whitewashing. The approach seems to have been on making this a widely-represented globe-trotting movie, based on how many different countries’ mafias are showcased, which explains the multitude of different character ethnicities. Brad Pitt was certainly a strange choice, all things considered, but I thought he was fine, and just likeable enough to warrant a lead role. The relationship between the twins, Lemon and Tangerine, however, was much more of a hook, and Brian Tyree Henry (who I've already praised on this website) was the closest the movie had to a standout performance. The way the characters speak and interact was closer to “what-big-studios-think-is-realistic” than actually “realistic”, but it still made for a good time. Examples include Brad Pitt’s general exhaustion/apathy and focus on spouting inspirational quotes from self help books, or Tangerine’s obsession with Thomas the Tank Engine- they both help give the film more of a unique identity, albeit a rather forced one.
In fact, that leads me into my next point- I believe the dialogue David Leitch, the director, brought to life was much better in his follow-up, The Fall Guy. Granted, they are from different screenwriters, but for some reason the two movies sound very similar. So, I figured I’d make this somewhat of a duo review and talk a little bit about The Fall Guy. While viewing the first half hour or so, I was ready to call it a modern favorite. Its dialogue was exactly, precisely how I write mine- realistic, passionate and funny, with characters stumbling over their words and making small talk and interrupting each other and laughing. I truly believe this Linklater-style dialogue could be a driving force behind a hugely scaled epic blockbuster if ever given the right opportunity, instead of bland cardboard-cutout Jason Stathams growling at the camera with lines clearly over-tampered with and overthought.
Unfortunately, The Fall Guy devolves into pretty generic territory after that, hampered down by a drawn-out finale and plenty of plot contrivances. Don’t get me wrong, I still liked it a lot- the action was great, Gosling and Blunt were both terrific and bounced off eachother excellently, and the laugh-out-loud humor was my favorite part (there’s a Shirley Temple joke that had me in tears, as well as Gosling’s and Blunt’s conversation with the megaphones on the film set), but it’s brought down in the latter hour by some dumb mistakes. Its pacing is soiled by the fact that its narrative finale seems to be in the middle, and by the actual overblown spectacle of a conclusion, I was pretty anxious to wrap up.
Speeding back to Bullet Train, Leitch seems to have traded the interesting characters and hilarious dialogue from The Fall Guy for style, flashiness, celebrity cameos and solid close-combat action. The colors and superimpositions are pretty cool, and the Japanese covers of classic American songs was a cute touch that fed into the cultural showcase direction nicely, but without much of a glue to hold the film together and a similarly over-the-top finale, Bullet Train fell just shy of being memorable enough to bring up at a dinner table multiple years after the fact.
If you want fine-tuned and brutal up-close action, watch John Wick. If you want realistic and apathetic humor in an unexpected scenario, watch an Edgar Wright movie. If you want a dual character dynamic that carries the film, watch Back to the Future. But if you want a colorful yet mindless time-killer loaded with megastars and a few chuckles that you won’t remember in a week, watch Bullet Train.
